When you feel like shit

You know what I hate most about feeling down and shitty? That I know, that thinking positive will help. Trying to be positive but not feeling it.

There you have your head telling you one thing and then there is your emotions making you feel the other. What an endless fight.

That’s how I felt most of the time last year (especially for the first few months of 2016)

I went through a tough time by loosing someone very important in my life. I felt upset, sad, frustrated, depressed and simply down.

I knew it would help to focus on good stuff. Stuff that makes me happy. Good thoughts and so on.

But as I mentioned already. Knowing it is one thing but also feeling it is a whole different story.

So how did I overcome that dark phase of mine?

Giving myself some time and allowing me to feel all those feelings. But then again, also pushing myself to not drown in it.

Watching some funny stuff before I went to bed (even though I felt stupid whilst doing so). Surrounding myself with friends to be distracted. Doing things to be distracted in general. Burying my head in work. Getting drunk and wasted.

I wouldn’t recommend all of it but in that very moment it was the only thing that worked for me.

Especially the distraction part. I needed to calm down my emotions or just let the whole thing “calm down” until I was ready to face it. It took me nearly a year until I was ready to face it but the “distraction-phase” was a good one.

If you are in a similar situation, I hope you might find some comfort by reading this.

If not, I hope you just enjoy this blog post(s) in general 🙂

So basically everything went downhill (for me) in February 2016.

I took some weeks for myself, just curled up on the couch or bed and got comforted by my dogs. Watched some TV shows that cheered me up or made me relate to their story to either feel understood or simply to escape reality.

But then the first big distraction aka adventure came up (in March) and I was forced to step outside of my house (besides work or walking my dogs) and face reality again.

I had a trip planned for months and the time was up. I didn’t feel like it but I went for it anyway. Why? Because I knew it would help. Did I like the thought of leaving my house/couch/bed? NO. But then again I knew I had to push myself.

Read in my next post, how I managed my first lil adventure in 2016 that helped me get better for the first time in over a month.

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