London calling!

Isn’t it funny how your perspective on things changes, once the circumstances in your life change?

This is something that I learned last year (April), when I had to actually leave the house (except for work, this was a big enough task at that time).

I referred to it in my previous blog post already.

I went through a very tough and dark phase after a break up and spent about 2 months just staying at home trying to nurse myself back to a normal state of mind. In between there was a lot of crying and dark thoughts.

Depending on the relationship and how far involved you are, it can be pretty devastating once it comes to an end. I just couldn’t let go and had all sorts of bad thoughts about myself.

I blamed myself for everything, I was looking for what I did wrong and what I could have done better. I went through so many weird stages (well my thoughts did) and its not easy to admit this but I think its good to share this in case you are/were in a similar situation.
I personally would have LOVED if someone wrote about it, because at that time, I felt so alone. Like nobody would understand that kind of feeling that I went through.

This was the worst. I thought nobody would understand my pain.

Now, this sounds quiet depressing, but don’t you worry, it gets better now.

I just want to give you some insight, so this makes more sense for you.

Now: I felt shitty, depressed and not good at all.

But there was that trip that I had booked already! It was a trip to London!

One of my best friends and his girlfriend had to go to London for work, so I said: why not meeting up there? I live in Ireland and my friend in middle Europe.

This was an easy enough trip for me and I could do with a friendly face or two.

I remember being in London before, but back then, I didn’t like it at all.

This brings me to my first sentence in this blog.

Isn’t it funny how your perspective on things changes, once the circumstances in your life change?

When I went to London for the very first time, I was still single. I wasn’t in a good mood back then and I remember not really wanting to be there (but I went over for a concert, so that was nice!).

I nearly hated it and cant even remember why exactly. I was simply not in a good mood/place at that time.

But then I went over again to see one of my best friends. I haven’t seen him for quiet a while so I got really excited. And because of the fact that I got so excited after 2 months feeling dead inside, I got even more excited!

There I was now. In London!

I must admit: we had a fantastic time. It was only for 2 days but besides spending some quality time together and talking about our problems in life, I also quiet enjoyed London itself!

My friend is a London fan, so he might just got me into it through his enthusiasm and excitement. But this was perfect! Exactly what I needed.

Since then, I see London with different eyes. I quiet enjoyed it and was surprised HOW MUCH I enjoyed it. I actually cant wait to be back at some stage, because my view on London changed. To the better.

And what changed?

Circumstances and people around me.

Isn’t this amazing? Something so simple can drastically improve your experience or life itself!

This was not the first time that my outlook on a city/country/situation changed last year through that change of circumstances.

But that will be written down another time.

So my conclusion:

If you experience something “negative” and think: I really don’t like this. I don’t enjoy it. Its shit!

Think about this: Are you in a bad place yourself at the moment? Are you having negative people around you? Did you try look at it from a neutral/positive point of view?

Always make sure you are not surrendered by negative people before judging a situation!

This shall be enough for today, thank you for reading everything!

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When you feel like shit

You know what I hate most about feeling down and shitty? That I know, that thinking positive will help. Trying to be positive but not feeling it.

There you have your head telling you one thing and then there is your emotions making you feel the other. What an endless fight.

That’s how I felt most of the time last year (especially for the first few months of 2016)

I went through a tough time by loosing someone very important in my life. I felt upset, sad, frustrated, depressed and simply down.

I knew it would help to focus on good stuff. Stuff that makes me happy. Good thoughts and so on.

But as I mentioned already. Knowing it is one thing but also feeling it is a whole different story.

So how did I overcome that dark phase of mine?

Giving myself some time and allowing me to feel all those feelings. But then again, also pushing myself to not drown in it.

Watching some funny stuff before I went to bed (even though I felt stupid whilst doing so). Surrounding myself with friends to be distracted. Doing things to be distracted in general. Burying my head in work. Getting drunk and wasted.

I wouldn’t recommend all of it but in that very moment it was the only thing that worked for me.

Especially the distraction part. I needed to calm down my emotions or just let the whole thing “calm down” until I was ready to face it. It took me nearly a year until I was ready to face it but the “distraction-phase” was a good one.

If you are in a similar situation, I hope you might find some comfort by reading this.

If not, I hope you just enjoy this blog post(s) in general 🙂

So basically everything went downhill (for me) in February 2016.

I took some weeks for myself, just curled up on the couch or bed and got comforted by my dogs. Watched some TV shows that cheered me up or made me relate to their story to either feel understood or simply to escape reality.

But then the first big distraction aka adventure came up (in March) and I was forced to step outside of my house (besides work or walking my dogs) and face reality again.

I had a trip planned for months and the time was up. I didn’t feel like it but I went for it anyway. Why? Because I knew it would help. Did I like the thought of leaving my house/couch/bed? NO. But then again I knew I had to push myself.

Read in my next post, how I managed my first lil adventure in 2016 that helped me get better for the first time in over a month.

Hello everybody

Wow, it’s been nearly a year since my very first blog post here!

I don’t really know why I didn’t continue writing. Maybe because I am not really a writer. I still would like to share my experiences and last year was just FULL of crazy and awesome ones.

But let me give you some kind of “overview” to understand the upcoming blog posts better.

I would consider myself as a spiritual person, however last year I spent a lot of time in pleasing my ego and chasing up happiness from the outside.

That means I did a lot of things last year to help me feel better after a shitty start into 2016.

The balance between ego & soul was off but that was okay and I consciously went for it.

Anyway, more to that in my later blog posts.

Before I start writing about one of my adventures last year:
You will find following here:

Posts about my travels & adventures

Posts about insights & conclusions about myself, people and life

Posts about events that moved me or left a major impression on me

Posts about some things I really like and would like to share with you

 

For now,

 

Stay tuned!